Relevance greater than or equal to how comfortable my pillow is

I had a revelation recently. No, it doesn’t have (much) to do with the new Assassin’s Creed game that just game out, it’s more to do with life in general! So there I was, at three in the morning, sitting there waiting to either fall asleep or get a surprise text message (it was the latter, btw), when suddenly I realized the reason I could not fall asleep was because I was angry.

I wasn’t angry at the surprise text message, nor was I angry at the possibility of our government trying to kill the internet again. No, I was angry at not being able to fall asleep. The hilarious part was, my anger is what kept me awake most of the night. This kind of self-perpetuating hatred on oneself is the kind of thing that makes emo poetry and gothic lipstick prosper! Thankfully I’m in College and my feet hurt so I didn’t run out to the local 24-hour hot topic to buy aforementioned lipstick, but what if it had been some other random High schooler?! Where does it stop?

I guess what I’m trying to say is that sometimes it’s better to just not worry about things. Maybe you’re a social outcast and maybe you’re enjoying and unrewarding and irrelevant activity a little bit too much, but in the end if you’re not having a good time then what’s the point?

Totally re-enacted this shot for the lulz

Moving on, I did actually manage to beat AssCreedRevs this morning, and I have to say that Ubisoft has shown a rather embarrassing aspect of production here. They put so much thought and detail into the world, focusing on the culture and atmosphere and making it “authentic” that when they’re forced to come up with something on their own, it falls flat. Constantinople might be amazing, but the Altair segments are rushed and sloppy, while the modern day segments and the “first civilization” segments just seem silly in comparison. Even the segments exploring Desmond’s past are lazy in comparison. As much as I like the puzzle mini-games reminiscent of Portal, 3D tetris alongside Nolan North’s admittedly awesome narration don’t make up for the fact that Desmond doesn’t do anything in this game. Again. I at least wanted to play through his past in a way similar to Altair’s segments. Not to mention there are so many sidequests and hidden things that most people won’t even bother with. They’ve spent so much time on the detail that the core adventure is flawed. Overall I’d say a year isn’t quite enough to make a game all it could be. The game shows its rough edges despite the polish. Still, I enjoyed myself… while not sleeping.

Assassin’s Creed Revelations was made by UbiSoft. That pic is of a guy named Ted. I’m tired.

Thank you and goodni- …morning.

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